What Have People Done Right

A few weeks ago on my LDS Adoption Support Group we had a great thread about what people have done to help us with our infertility struggle. I will have to keep thinking of things to add to this list because I really enjoy reading it.

- When we were struggling with our infertility in the beginning we didn't tell anyone. I'm sure several of you hear also chose to "suffer in silence." One Sunday the RS President stopped me in the hall and she told me that she had the impression to put my name on the temple prayer roll. That was it. Didn't ask what was wrong, just thought of us and she didn't even know she needed to.

- Right after we decided to adopt, my grandma had a heart attack. We went to see her and my grandpa at the hospital. While we were there we told them that we had decided to adopt. They were so wonderful. My grandpa told me to remember the most important thing about his grandchildren is that they look like him. He said it didnt' matter what our child looked like or where they came from, he knew they would look like him. No wonder he's my favorite grandpa.

- I have a friend that is super sensitive about my feelings. And I love her for it. When she became pregnant she called me up to tell me and I could tell she was so scared to how I would react. But she didn't want me to hear it from anyone else. And she is super great when I am around her and her toddler. My in-laws make me for so out of place around my nephew, but this friend lets me interact with her little girl, she encourages it.

- Another friend had a baby about 5 months ago. She told me that I never need to ask if I want to hold, I just need to take him and hold him. She had another member of the ward give her 2 garbage bags full of baby clothes. She brought me one of the bags and said she would never be able to use everything that was given to her.

- On a blessing day in church the family choose to attend all of church before going home for the dinner. They came in late to Sunday School and sat right in front of us. I'm sure I looked at the baby like I was a woman dying of thirst. They let me hold her!

- I think the funniest thing is, every time someone in my support groups adopts they are so super sensitive to everyone else's feelings. They are almost apologetic because they beat us to parent hood. But after having several announcements like that come up, I now understand. I am so happy for them, but sometimes it is hard to trudge forward while feeling left behind.