Can I just say, I think yesterday was the most peaceful Mother's Day I've ever had? As the weekend started, I kept expecting to get anxious, but I never did.
I think several factors helped.
1) We always turn that day into a celebration of the other spouse. So its not Mother's Day, but Savannah's Day. In June, we will have Josh's Day. We buy each other a gift and then that person gets to decide what they want to do that day. This year, Josh gave me some charms for my Pandora bracelet and a new necklace. Then he picked out two cards. A sappy romantic one from him, and then a cute humorous one from him and the fur-babies, which included an iTunes gift card from the fur-babies.
2) Maybe I'm selfish, but I find it hard to celebrate Mother's on that day. I was talking with a friend this weekend, and told her, "I love my mom every day. But when it comes to Mother's Day, I have a hard time focusing on that love because I'm too caught up in my own grief of what never was." That day always makes it harder on me. So I choose to avoid mother's on that day. Its nothing against them, I just am usually in such a horrid state of mind that I can't be around others.
3) Church was amazing this year. Its probably been 8 years since I've been to church on that dreaded day. I just couldn't handle it. But over the past few months, I've developed a much deeper relationship with God. I always considered myself a religious person, but I'm not starting to realize, I was never a spiritual person. I've had some amazing changes take place in my heart and soul. I have a deeper love for my Savior than ever before. I think that is one of the biggest reasons this year was so much easier. Our pastor did a beautiful job of acknowledging mothers in all walks of life.
You can find more of this weeks #MicroblogMondays posts HERE.
As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to God, because He was my friend. But then, instead o fleaving Him, in peace, to work alone; I hung around and tried to help, with ways that were my own. At last, I snatched them back and cried, "How can you be so slow?" "My child," He said, "What could I do? You never did let go." --Author Unknown
May 2007 - Start the MASS amounts of paperwork with LDSFS
December 2007 - Home study
January 2008 - APPROVED!
January 2009 - Go online with Parent Profiles
February 2009- Contacted by our 1st scammer
March 2009 - Parent Profiles Contact - she is looking because her sister is pregnant. (never heard back)
April 2009 - Submitted our paperwork on a possible situation (never heard back)
May 2009 - Contacted by another scammer
May 19, 2009 - Our CW called to ask if he could show our profile to a birth mom. Of course we said yes. Please pray for us and for her. *Update - we've never heard back from her...
July 2009 - Took a jump off the cliff and inquired about a sibling group in a neighboring state. They told us they would get ahold of us in about 30 days. At the end of the month I noticed they aren't on the website anymore, so they must have found a family.
August 2009 - Said no to a situation - we knew it wasn't our baby.
September 2009 - I'm getting more proactive, I called a hospital in Wyoming and asked if I could send our profile. They seemed excited. I would love if our baby came from Wyoming! Our profile has never even had a hit from Wyoming.
October 20, 2009 - First email from C
November 29, 2009 - First phone call with C. We going to go meet her!
December 4th, 2009 - We met C and her family. They are amazing. We arrived home that night to find an email saying she choose us!!!!
March 2 2010 - We were unchosen. Our hearts are broken.
June 2010 - Now what? We're not sure.
May 2011 - Officially closed our adoption profile with LDSFS. Enjoying life as a family of two.
My passions include Jesus, 6 awesome nephews, baking, scrapbooking, makeup, cupcakes, kittens, and reading.
I'm a payroll specialist by day, a Younique Makeup Presenter by night, and a follower of Jesus 24/7.