As I have struggled this month to realize that we have been approved for a year I have had some wonderful people tell me things and I find myself going back to their comments often because they give me peace of mind. This first comment is from a blog I follow. This family has adopted 3 children from different countries in the world and are currently trying to adopt one more. Last week I asked her how they had been able to afford it. I am now very humbled because I think our adoption will cost pennies compared to what they have had to spend, but then again that is why we chose our agency. Her website is www.manytimesblessed.blogspot.com, but I want to post the words she said at the very end that really touched my heart.
"In the same way, I truly, completely believe that if God leads any of you to adopt that He is going to provide the resources to do it. God doesn't lead us to something and then abandon us. He walks with us every single step of the way. He doesn't start things that He doesn't finish. If you feel led to adopt, don't look at the price tag - look at your God and ask Him for direction. He will give it and He will work out the details."
The other comment I wanted to post was said in one of our discussions of my LDS Adoptive Parents support group. Another gal had started this discussion because she was feeling frustrated over how little progress they have made. Of course I had to join in and say "me too!"I am actually posting the comment that was made more towards her, but I think I needed to hear it too. The comment was made by another member of this group who also lives in Utah and they have 2 kids.
"I think in almost every adoption journey there comes the time we have to stop "doing" and just put it in the Lord's hands. I'm not saying this is the time for you, (name removed), because I don't know. But I do think there can be such an emphasis on "finding" and being proactive that we can forget this this is all in the Lord's time. This is the very hardest lesson to learn. I know for me, I thought adoption would be the answer to all my troubles of not being able to conceive. I did not expect that adopting would turn out to be just as great a trial and test of faith, but it was. (We waited two years for our first child.) It is very hard to balance making sure we are putting forth the effort to help things happen and also being in that emotional and spiritual place of "being still" and giving up control. I don't even think there are words to express how hard this is! I know that, for me, there came a point when I knew that it was time to stop praying frantically for our baby to come and really, truly submit to the Lord's will, even if it meant never having a child. This was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do in my life, and blessedly, our baby arrived very shortly after that. But the thing about this kind of submission and sacrifice is that there are no promises...you do not know for sure what's around the corner, that's part of the test.
I think you have to take a step back and listen very carefully to the spirit and try to discern what it is telling you: try another avenue to make your adoption happen? or find peace in knowing you've done everything the Lord wants you to do at that point and then letting the Him take care of it?"