I know the chances of you reading this are pretty much zero. You don't me and I don't know you.
Recently, I stumbled onto an adoption story and I thought of you. A couple was chosen about a month before the baby was due. The person mention that another couple had been considered, but she was having doubts, so she changed her mind.
Now let me take a moment here. That is the birth mom's choice, as it should be. The adoption process is about the baby and the birth mom, as it should be. It is her choice. I'm not questioning that. This post isn't about the birth mom and her own grief. Or the adoptive couple. Take them out of the scenario. I'm just looking at a stranger that is going thru their own type of grief.
I just want to acknowledge your loss. You were hoping to bring home a baby and at the last minute it feel through. Maybe you had a name picked out. Maybe you had a nursery set up. Now, all you have is a broken heart.
If you had miscarried the baby, you would have something a little more tangible. But all you had was hope & love and now it is gone.
I remember trying to go on with life, like nothing had happened. But inside, I was devastated. I think one of the things that has bothered me most is how NO ONE ever acknowledges our dream and its heartbreak ending. (I got flowers when my sister announced her pregnancy. But when we lost our hope & dreams of a baby, nothing.)
So it is my hope, by some fate, you will stumble onto this blog post. Please know, I feel your loss. I have shed tears for you. I have prayed that God will give you comfort. Please know that I love you.
As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to God, because He was my friend. But then, instead o fleaving Him, in peace, to work alone; I hung around and tried to help, with ways that were my own. At last, I snatched them back and cried, "How can you be so slow?" "My child," He said, "What could I do? You never did let go." --Author Unknown
May 2007 - Start the MASS amounts of paperwork with LDSFS
December 2007 - Home study
January 2008 - APPROVED!
January 2009 - Go online with Parent Profiles
February 2009- Contacted by our 1st scammer
March 2009 - Parent Profiles Contact - she is looking because her sister is pregnant. (never heard back)
April 2009 - Submitted our paperwork on a possible situation (never heard back)
May 2009 - Contacted by another scammer
May 19, 2009 - Our CW called to ask if he could show our profile to a birth mom. Of course we said yes. Please pray for us and for her. *Update - we've never heard back from her...
July 2009 - Took a jump off the cliff and inquired about a sibling group in a neighboring state. They told us they would get ahold of us in about 30 days. At the end of the month I noticed they aren't on the website anymore, so they must have found a family.
August 2009 - Said no to a situation - we knew it wasn't our baby.
September 2009 - I'm getting more proactive, I called a hospital in Wyoming and asked if I could send our profile. They seemed excited. I would love if our baby came from Wyoming! Our profile has never even had a hit from Wyoming.
October 20, 2009 - First email from C
November 29, 2009 - First phone call with C. We going to go meet her!
December 4th, 2009 - We met C and her family. They are amazing. We arrived home that night to find an email saying she choose us!!!!
March 2 2010 - We were unchosen. Our hearts are broken.
June 2010 - Now what? We're not sure.
May 2011 - Officially closed our adoption profile with LDSFS. Enjoying life as a family of two.
My passions include Jesus, 6 awesome nephews, baking, scrapbooking, makeup, cupcakes, kittens, and reading.
I'm a payroll specialist by day, a Younique Makeup Presenter by night, and a follower of Jesus 24/7.